Resolving Hurt Feelings with Rosita and Friends

Misunderstandings and hurt feelings can be opportunities to build friendships and develop important social skills.

As children talk, listen, play, and try to make sense of the world around them, they sometimes learn lessons the hard way: they may hurt others’ feelings without meaning to, or they may feel misunderstood.  

These moments can be difficult, but they’re also important teachable moments—opportunities for grown-ups to “lean in,” slow down, listen, talk, and support children’s growing social skills. Together, watch this video about a difficult moment, then talk about how the friends resolved the problem.  

Later, in everyday moments, you might:  

  • Let children see you speaking up or taking action when you notice something unfair. Talk about how you feel about it, and model respectful ways of communicating and standing up for others.  
  • Ask questions. When children talk about a conflict they experienced or witnessed, ask: What do you think about that? How did you feel? How do you think [the other person] felt? What did you say or do (or not say or do), and why? What did others do or not do? What could you do if it happens again?  

Just for Educators! Focusing on solutions helps you build a safe classroom community. Check out Positive Problem Solving in action and this video around Helping Kids Resolve Conflicts. The earlier young children learn problem-solving, they better they can manage conflicts and challenging issues as they grow older.  

Creative problem-solving that incorporates children’s insight and ideas leads to strong communities that can work together: Check out this professional development course on co-creating an inclusive, welcoming, and fair classroom community for all children, parents, and families.   

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