Article

Managing Changes

Use these tips to help a child dealing with divorce to feel secure in daily routines.

During changes and transitions, it’s more important than ever to remind children that there are some things—like daily routines and loving relationships—that will stay the same.

Routines

Keeping up simple activities and routines will provide children with a sense of security and stability in their everyday lives.

Take photos of children doing an everyday routine that will stay the same, such as a bedtime routine. Then make a slideshow on your phone to look at together each night. This will remind children of the things they can expect to happen each day—no matter where they are.

Try saying: “I know some things have been changing, but lots of routines will stay the same. Every night, you’ll eat dinner and then get ready for bed. You’ll brush your teeth, change into your pajamas, and read a book before lights go out.”

Care 

With changes in routines and living arrangements, children might begin to worry that everyone will be too busy to take care of them. Reassure them that no matter where they are, someone will always be there to support them.

Let kids know who they can expect to drop them off at school, pick them up from a play date, or put them to bed. Find opportunities to remind them that there are so many people, in addition to their parents, who love them and will take care of them.

Try saying: “Mommy and Daddy might not live together anymore, but we will always be your mommy and daddy. No matter what, that will never change, and we will always take care of you.”